Not much to say

Everyone or everyone I know has an opinion.

That’s fine.

But what does it achieve?

Are they preaching?
Trying to convert me?
Or simply speaking their mind?

I don’t know.

But from where I sit it’s based on a template, a well-worn template of past conditioning.

A simple example will suffice:

When you’re born you have no language. It’s there but it doesn’t come until later. And when it does come, depending on where you live, will dictate the language you speak. (English is my language.) And you’re told certain things represent certain things — e.g. a chair, table, or apple (not the best examples I grant you but you get the picture). You don’t or at least I don’t think you get to question the same. Beyond the labels, again because of what you’ve been told, you also attach meaning; namely, good behaviour is favoured by the adults etc., whereas bad behaviour is frowned upon. Sadly, I was always in the latter camp by dint of the fact that I never or rarely accepted what I was told (“Why?).

It gets worse.

You go to school. The early years are fine — it’s mostly play. The latter years suck. They’re predicated on assimilating you into the meatgrinder of work until, I assume, you retire.

Are you with me?

Whenever do we ask a more meaningful question:

What is this (i.e. life) all about?

We don’t.

We exist or fill our days with lots of activity and call that life.

In my case, I fell from a great height and lost everything. But it made me realise that EVERYTHING I’d been told was a pile of horseshit. The words did not describe the things I was looking at, my thoughts were not real and free will and choice was an illusion.

No, in case you’re asking I’m not enlightened but I am awake. 

And that means there’s nowhere to hide, even though I’d be lying if I didn’t struggle to understand why the hell my parents brought me into this world. If truth be told, I would rather they hadn’t given the level of suffering I’ve had to endure — but of course, that’s a whole other story.

And my point?

Who are you?

Who the bejesus are you?

Isn’t it about time you asked that sort of question? If not, are you simply playing by the rules invented by someone or something else?

And if you think this all nonsensical, I’d wager it’s because you’re asleep at the wheel.

Until tomorrow.

Take care,

— Julian

Photo by Wolfgang Hasselmann on Unsplash